Always Find Your Way Back
Well, I'm back after a crazy 8 weeks. Let me tell you guys that this felt like the most challenging season I have ever been in. It felt as though God had been silent for a while. Literally, during school, I ended up getting sick with covid. Covid and nursing school is not a good mix. Missing one week of school was literally like missing a whole month. I don't know how I made it through. Still, somehow God aligned it perfectly to where I was able to end my quarantine and test negative the Sunday right before clinical started. I had to play "catch up," and it was a whole different world being behind and unable to keep up with everyone.
I can't tell you guys how often my instructor asked me if I was okay. Things in my life took a turn for what I thought was the end for me because I literally saw no way out. I felt lost, confused, alone, and I honestly didn't think I would make it to the end of this course. I was an emotional mess, and I was more confused about why God allowed me to go through this in nursing school. For whatever reason, now looking back at it, God had something crazy yet something good for me waiting at the end of it all. I couldn't see past what was before me, but God was ahead of me, working things out for the better. Little did I know what God was preparing me for.
During the last 3 weeks of this class, I was about to fail if I couldn't get my life together. I had to push, I gave up a lot, and I thought I was going through this alone. God then showed up like he always does and placed certain people in my life to help me get through this. Still, at the same time, these people showed me what it means to be loved and to be supported precisely in the way that God has called us to be for each other. It's mind-blowing when God answers our prayers when we least expect it. He has such great timing that sometimes I laugh at myself because if I had waited just a little longer, I would have seen what God was doing the entire time. Not everything that happens in this life will go the way we want it to, sometimes, it's going to feel like our life is falling apart, and sometimes it's going to feel like we are on top of the world. Still, through it, God is always at work. Like I've said before, sometimes the teacher has to be quiet during the test.
It's hard to see God orchestrating things when we can't see the bigger picture. When God allows us to look at our situation from a different perspective, our hearts become more open to seeing that God uses what is broken and turns it into something beautiful.